New York Post Dating: Better Than Average

Winning streaks don't last forever, sadly. This week, we see our Meet Market matchup stumble out of the gate and never pick up steam. Tom and Mackenzie are no longer hot, but we might pick things back up again next week. So, let's begin with our recap...

David chose Amber for the date. My warning last week was that Amber needed someone quite interesting to be a romantic partner, because otherwise things wouldn't work out. I approved of David, but I didn't think he'd meet Amber's expectations.

And was I right?

I was right.

Amber was immediately dismissive of David due to a time mixup. He never quite recovered from his late arrival to El Faro ("which made for a great blind date spot!"), although the date was quite eventful overall. (After dinner, he took her out for dancing and "overpriced" drinks. Aww, how sweet. Now stop complaining about the prices.) I think she knew immediately that there wasn't the flame of romance burning between them. That's a shame, because David's a little more hopeful than she is for future romance. Love sucks.

So, in the end, Amber's rather picky and David's a little cheap. Crash, fire, burn. Sorry, try again.

There's better news for next week, though. Kelli is our female dater, and there's three critically important things you need to know about her:

• She's unbelievably hot. Like a porn star.
• She just moved to New York a month ago. This is on top of being rather young and perky.
• She's Jason's roommate. Jason? That's right, The Closer.

Needless to say, I'm overflowing with excitement for Kelli. I think her Closer connection is going to bring her good luck on the date. Still, though, as she admits herself, average isn't good enough. She's got three guys to pick from, so let's see if we can shoot for the moon here.

David is a 26-year-old "real estate finance executive." If God had a job title, that would be it. Quotables:

What do you think of the New York dating scene? Just because you pour syrup on it, doesn't make it pancakes.

What three things can you not live without? Ranch dressing, electricity and vacation days.

Gems! What the hell does any of that mean? Bizarre! And with all the food mentions, it's a good thing the date will probably be at a self-promoting restaurant! Otherwise, the most important nugget is, "I'm a genuine person, just trying to find my way like everyone else." Just like Kelli. I think he's got potential with her.

Next, we have Mark, a young actor.

I work out daily

Meh. I walk to the subway daily, too. After reading the rest of his profile, he seems alright - but rather average in every department, if you know what I mean. David's got it all over him.

Finally, we have Neil. He spooks me out a little bit, as some of these daters do when the photograph is really bad (or worse, when they're just not photogenic). Let's see if personality can make up for it:

We're buying. What are you drinking? Pabst Blue Ribbon in a can.

Classy! My kind of guy! But not Kelli's type of guy. Out.

So, in the end, it's David all the way. David's got 60% of the vote already on Monday. No brainer. Just cross your fingers and hope for the best for these two young love-seekers. (And we'll hope the restaurant has a "great atmosphere", as always.) Bounce.