Uhhh, wow, or something

PARIS BURNS IN NEW SEX TAPE: http://nypost.com/gossip/pagesix.htm (works only today, 9/28... look up today's paper online in the archives starting tomorrow)

I can't make up my mind between whether this is shocking or expected. I would be shocked by the stupidity on display, but really now - is there anything that Paris won't do to get herself some sleaze-ridden free publicity? I mean, is she going to have public lesbian sex with Madonna next? Pose nude for a Vanity Fair cover ala Demi Moore? Maybe the next porn tape will be a spanking fetish video? I can't think about it anymore. I have a vivid imagination, and I'm clueless as to how she can top what she's done already.

The worst part is, it's very much attention-getting, but it's not sexy at all. I don't know how people could enjoy watching this stuff. I have fantasies myself, but they usually don't involve my own hairy ass or girls who are pathetically skinny and skanky. However, watching one of these tapes gets you the hairy ass and the skinny skank. Large numbers of men drool; I grin with a sense of schadenfreude, but it's hardly as titillating as it is unbecoming.

Yeah, it's a slow news day.